Many, many moons ago, a man I was seeing burned me a 311 CD because I hated them. I was loud about not liking them, and he wanted to expose me to the whole vibe. And he did. I had just moved from a very small town in Michigan to a relatively medium-sized college town an hour away. My music knowledge and obscure points of conversation with anyone were impressive and elite (to me anyway). However, I learned very quickly that I had been very snotty, close-minded, and frankly, naive. My father was a very talented trombonist, even playing in Austria for a time. Then, he was touring in local bands, including Bryan Adams/KISS cover band(s). What I know about music is because of him and my dear mother, who was an REO Speedwagon and Goo Goo Dolls fanatic. My musical love spans across Marvin Gaye, Led Zeppelin, Manchester Orchestra, Anderson .Paak, Fleetwood Mac, Rage Against The Machine, and dips into Jeff Buckley when I’m emotional and need a good cry. The reason I discuss this is that hearing that 311 CD changed my life; it humbled me in not only how I see music but how I see other people, and how I see the world. I love 311; it wasn’t on my radar, I fought hard to NOT like them, but they are one of my favorite bands to this day. And I am still great friends with the 311 guy because of this!

They say music is life, and when someone sends me a song, it’s like a handwritten card (I love those too) with lyrics that impact, change, and soothe. Like poetry, people take what speaks to them; in that moment, you and that song will be a part of that person’s memory forever. To me, that is one of the most intimate and romantic things we can do for each other, platonically and romantically. Last year, a man burned me 40+ songs for my birthday, ranging from Hip Hop, Neo Soul, Indie, and Rock that were attuned directly to me; my style, how I love, how masculine I can be, how feminine I can be, how I show up for my friends—it was all there. Another close friend who is a musical genius, podcaster, and artist curated me a mind-blowing CD with his intentional art for the case; it was so meaningful and magical of our time together. Recently, I had a friend over…I left the room, and when I came back, he had put on my Back to Black Amy Winehouse vinyl and had candles burning. The stage was set, and so are the memories associated with that album now. I think the key to romance is to be seen by someone in all its messiness, the “too much” aspect, the good, the weird, and the unknown. While some love affairs don’t last, it is the effort to be curious about someone, to adore them for exactly who they are, and to be able to convey (sometimes by song) that that makes us human. We all give and take a piece of each other that keeps us evolving into our next chapters. Life is wild!

Going into 2026, my main focus is to keep my heart open, ask more questions, be curious about people, and lead with love and understanding without self-abandoning myself. What is yours? Cheers, bebes!

Music Cue: I Know How To Speak by Manchester Orchestra (stumbled into their amazing beach concert in Gulf Shores randomly…see??)